April Showers Bring...

Hi all!

Currently writing you from my kitchen on the third day of April, which also happens to be the third consecutive day of gloomy rain this week. Ugh! I feel like that kind of reflects the sentiments of this month’s blog post. I am in what feels like another transitional state. A little lost, a little confused. Not anything too abysmal but just kind of meh.

Last month I felt super optimistic. The clocks changed, businesses in town were opening up, I started a new part time gig, and was ramping up my own business endeavors. Well, all of that has happened and has been good, but now things are sort of static. Starting this business in the fall, I thought that the spring and summer would be go, go, go. I would experience the high demands of growth and flourish into a legitimate fully operational business (whatever that means!). That’s not my reality just yet.

I think what I’m lacking is consistency, which has always been a challenge when navigating this vs. personal/work life. Online sales are sporadic and I’m on a monthly pop up schedule for the time being, which feels comfortable especially now that I have another job. I guess what I’m trying to get at is that everything here is working to an extent, but I don’t really feel like I am leveling up. I would love to achieve more consistent sales, grow my social media audience (I’ve had my account since 2017 and have less than 2K followers, lol it’s cool!), and feel like I am an actual force to be reckoned with in my community. But when I reflect upon all of that, I also understand that there may be causes of my own doing as to why that’s all not happening at the speed I want it to.

Generally, I try not to put too much pressure on myself because I don’t want to suck the joy out of what I am doing. But maybe I could be a little more tenacious to achieve higher yield results. I also sometimes am not sure what course this all is going to take, which can be confusing. For example, I consider looking into brick and mortar spaces around here as a next step, but am hesitant due to financial constraints. Would I fare better going in more of a service oriented direction that has less overhead, focusing on my creative abilities? These are recurring thoughts that swirl around and have caused anxiety over the years. Having a clear, consistent voice and direction is so important when launching your own business and is definitely something I struggle with.

So that was some heavy introspective writing but as always, my hope is to find ways in which we can relate to one another and to spark conversation. I have always shared the good and the bad here. Hopefully over the course of the next month, I can overcome some of these uncertainties and find my way in a positive direction. Just writing this fully transparent post is step 1. During these times, I try to find gratitude for what I do currently have and face whatever is bothering me rather than cower away. So I’ll manifest forward motion in any form that I can. Keep trying. Experiment with new things. Even if it’s small or slow, doing something is better than nothing, right?

Here’s to encouraging one another to stop comparing and to just keep going!

<3